I know I haven't been consistent in my postings. Life has been, well...interesting. To say the least..if it weren't for coffee, well...would I be lost? Naw, not really. But would I wander around, disoriented and confused for a bit? Maybe. Read on.
The latest...
I took a temp job at a local Hospice organization last week. Might be an ongoing job, who knows. Awesome people, great cause, and a great location, within walking distance, although I don't walk to work, and here's the reason:
This last Friday morning, I decided to take a coffee break at the Starbucks across the street. I approached the busy intersection at Fulton and Marconi, only to be greeted by an older black woman sitting on the corner with what I assumed were her belongings, and a "street friend" (a white man) who had a backpack on. They had been conversing (it was apparent that they knew each other), and when I approached the intersection, here is what ensued:
Black Lady: "Oh, don't you be lookin' down on me."
Me: (Silent, confused).
Black Lady: "Yeah, I'm talking to you."
Me: "Me?" (Looking around, confused.)
Black Lady: "Yeah, you."
Me: Silent.
Black Lady: "I know that look. You think you better than me. Fuck you."
Me: "No, I don't." (Trying to gather my wits.)
Black Lady: "Oh, yes you do. You look down on us."
Me: "I am not looking down on anyone." (I was going to say "Miss", but...that would be the Nashville comin' out of me, and I wasn't in Nashville, so...)
Black Lady: "You looking down on me. I know you."
Me: "No, I am not looking down on you."
Black Lady: "I know you. I know your kind."
Me: "I don't know you, and you don't know me."
Black Lady: "Oh, I know you. I can read you like a book."
Me: "No, you don't know me. I'm just standing here, waiting for the light."
Black Lady: "You think you better than all of us."
This lady started babbling on about (from what I could decipher) what she felt were injustices of her being on the street, her situation, etc. She yelled after me, cursing and swearing. I felt like some sort of pariah.
Mind you, I was dressed in business attire (as required by my temp agency). Never mind that I was working a full-time job for a hospice organization - people who deal with death and dying, every day. People of every race, color, creed and culture. So I was kind of in the mode of "death takes all prisoners".
Thankfully, a very kind (rather large) black man came to my rescue:
Huge Black Dude: "Hey, wha'sup?"
Me: "I'm ok, you? (Still a bit shaken up)
Huge Black Dude: "Listen up. Don't talk to people like that. Just keep walkin'. Don't pay no attention to that."
Me: "Okay."
Huge Black Dude: "It don't matter. What they say don't matter."
Me: "Why?"
Huge Black Dude: "They bad talk you because they don't know nothing else. Nothing good will come of it. If you talk back, one of two things will happen. You'll be street tagged, or the cops will come. Just keep walkin'. Best thing."
Me: "I didn't do anything."
Huge Black Dude: "Don't matter."
Well, it did (kinda) matter to me, but...I did keep on walking, as directed. No one was happier to reach the doors of Starbucks than I was that day. I agreed with this man; this situation was not enough for me to engage, and at the same time, I learned a lot about life on the streets of Sacramento.
What did I learn? That there are several different types of homeless/transient/street people, and learned that race and ethnicity may have very little to do with it. It is largely about socio-economic class/status...a "byproduct" that is [somewhat] removed by the issue of race and color, but not by much. What I observed is that this black woman had the company of a white man with a backpack, and once she tried to engage/argue with me about my appearance, he was the one that backed off/disappeared, and was nowhere to be found when the above incident went down.
So who was there? Me, dressed in business attire (a requirement of the job) with a Beijo purse and Coach sunglasses.
No, I did not engage in an argument about who I was, but...it was a long few minutes on the corner as I was being judged, up and down, by a woman who claimed she could "read me like a book". Could I claim the same? Could I read her like a book? It's true...she didn't know me, but I didn't know her. Nothing good could have come from arguing that my own ancestry and history included genocide, violence, abuse, pain and suffering. I think Mr. Huge Black Dude was my angel that day.
Stereotypes. Big heavy sigh. What do we do with them? We are all a bit prejudiced to some degree...after all, 'birds of a feather"...but when it comes down to being a human being in the bigger picture of Planet Earth, well...that's where I get a bit defensive. It's not about race, color, religion or socio-economic status. It is about being a good human being. It is sad when it is reduced down to a street corner on Marconi and Fulton.
After dealing with "Ms. Street Corner"...I over-heard her begging for cash and coins from passersby. I myself was about to reach in my wallet and prove that I was not who she said I was. If it weren't for my Angel that day, I probably would have. Just keep walkin'. Sad.
Homelessness and transient problems are big issues here in Sacramento...as it is in most metros. There are organizations that try very hard to help, such as http://sacramentostepsforward.org/, http://www.sacramentofoodbank.org/, as well as several churches and non-profits. But as I live and breathe in the "inner city"...I often wonder if homelessness is or is not a lifestyle choice. I'm sure it is not for a few, but...when I see overflowing grocery carts parked on major thoroughfares...when I see aggressive beggars behind cardboard signs...when I experience what I did yesterday, first-hand, well...it causes me to think about life in general.
Since moving here, I've befriended a few "street folks". Most recently, I've befriended a recovering crack addict who is attending a nearby church, trying to get her life in order. She loves our dog, Logan, and she goes on and on about her life, her plans for the future, her disabled mother. Sometimes she puts her hand on my shoulder and prays. I don't mind. If it helps, I will pray with her. But most of the time, all she needs is someone to listen to her. I will listen. I'm good at listening.
If "Ms. Street Corner" could read me like a book, she would know that I would listen to her, too. But I wasn't dressed for the occasion. Usually, when I go out into the "hood", I'm dressed in sweat pants, a flannel jacket-shirt and slip on tennis shoes. My hair is tied up in a scrappy bun...little or no makeup...and I fit right in. Funny, how the one day I dress otherwise, waiting at an intersection for a light...and I'm judged and "read like a book".
When I lived in Nashville, race was never an issue. I befriended and respected so many fellow human beings, regardless of color, creed, religion, etc. More specific individuals...Coylette James of Coylette James Ministries...Pastor Henry Coles of Faith Life...in circles of prayer with Sharon Skaggs (wife of Ricky Skaggs) and the amazing Sarah Lowe with the National Day of Prayer campaigns...singing in The Nashville Choir with so many talented musicians and vocalists. Call me naive, but...I still do not understand how race, ethnicity and religion are even players in the fight for humanity these days.
How can anyone "read me as a book"? Let me help you. I'm a music minister at an Episcopal Church in the adorable, cute little hamlet of Sutter Creek, California. I run a small community newspaper, Amador Community News, out of my home. I am the webmaster of several sites and blogs. I take a temp job now and then...like I did last week with this hospice organization. I love coffee. I love Bollywood movies. I love music...
Please, read me like a book. But be accurate. If I had the balls, I might have asked this black woman on the corner to join me at Starbucks for a cup of coffee. But I was too scared because of her biasness towards me, a fellow human being on Planet Earth.
Unfortunate, but...thanks to an angel who walked me the rest of the way..."It don't matter. Nothing good will come of it. Just keep walkin'. Best thing."
What a world.
Saturday, February 22, 2014
Saturday, January 25, 2014
You put your right hand in, you put your left foot out...oh, wait...that's NOT what it's all about
I was in a grocery store not so long ago where they had those big clear bins of buy-in-bulk coffee beans. Like I've said before, I'm no coffee snob, but...I tend to stay away from oily beans that have sat in bins for a bit too long. It's kinda sad, though...I look into the bins, press my nose up against their plastic prison cells, and the beans just sit there on top of each other, as if to say, "Please, save us!" And I just have to say, "I'm sorry...I'm so, so sorry..." Walking away is the hard part, as I grab a vacuum-sealed bag of coffee just a couple feet away.
I know it's been a while since posting, but I've been busy with my little Amador County community e-newspaper/blog, Amador Community News. It's been an interesting week; many more are catching on to the concept of independent, community news. It looks like I'm finally reaching that broad demographic plane consisting of those "from one to ninety-two" via Facebook, Twitter and Google+. The best thing, however, has always been that ol' over the fence, word-of-mouth. Every once in a while, I'll post: "Say you saw it...on ACN"...people actually do, and I appreciate it. All of our readers appreciate it. I find great satisfaction, knowing that I can help with the flow of information in Amador County.
Last week I posted an announcement about a Town Hall meeting being held in Plymouth, where Congressman Tim McClintock would be present to take a few questions from the citizens in attendance. Every time I run something that might be politically charged, I run the following disclaimer: "Amador Community News, NewsAmador.com is a non-partisan and politically neutral community news, information and resource site, and does not endorse political parties or candidates."
After posting the announcement for the meeting on ACN's Facebook wall, a certain reader commented that ACN's stance of being non-partisan and politically neutral made her want to "puke".
Why would such a thing piss someone off like that? I really don't know. In a nation already cluttered with slanted, biased, politically-charged (and bought) media, I don't find it difficult at all to be non-partisan. I believe that community news is about the community's voice, not advertisers' voices, and there's room for everyone to express their views (with respect).
After the "puke" comment, there were several more comments with the nature of "tell McClintock" this or that. I gathered from the comments that many do not like McClintock's politics. After a while, however, I felt like I was being shot at (for simply being the messenger), so I pulled the post, but not before defending ACN. But I still had to wonder why so many felt more comfortable posting on ACN's Facebook wall, than taking the time to get out from behind their computers or cell phones, actually attending the Town Hall Meeting in person and facing the Congressman themselves. After all...I see their Facebook posts. They have plenty of time to drink and schmooze and social gatherings and events, but don't have the time to attend a town hall meeting for 10-15 minutes?
Oh well, I guess I'm just naive. I suppose people just aren't used to or ready for a non-partisan, politically neutral platform that is open and willing to receive Letters to the Editor, commentaries and opinions, regardless of political affiliation.
Funny...I thought that's what the First Amendment was all about:
This Amendment does not define who has these freedoms; it says that Congress "shall make no law". But it also doesn't give permission to influential political parties, affluent organizations (including religious), and corporate media to make some sort of "unspoken" set of laws or rules that assume to define those freedoms for the rest of us. It also doesn't define social, nor economic class...
It does include the words "freedom"..."free exercise"..."right of the people"..."peaceably to assemble"..."petition the Government". These are all things and actions that Congress cannot make laws against. So where does the power lie? In the hands of the people.
I cannot prevent disgruntled readers, armchair politicians and religious zealots from posting what they do on Facebook. The most I can do is delete, block and mediate the kind of content I do or do not allow for ACN. But what I will do is defend what community media stands for, and I stand for First Amendment rights that many people have seem to forgotten about because of the global soup of corporate media muck that readers have to sink or swim through to get the facts. So I will leave it up to the corporate, ad-driven media giants and their loyal subjects to do their so-called "fair and unbiased" reporting, be the bearers of "shock value" entertainment news, and influence the ignorant with their contrived hokey-pokey dances. I'd rather focus more on content than advertising. I'd rather focus upon what Amador County's communities are doing to build each other up and improve. I'd rather give Amador County the spotlight, give them a platform to have a true voice as to what they are "all about"...and to me, we the people is "what it's all about".
I was born into and raised in a Republican, right-winged household. A life-changing event in 1996 had affected me in all aspects of life - socially, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, politically. But today, for the record, I truly am non-partisan. I'm not a Republican nor Democrat, nor any party whatsoever. I'm not on the left, nor right. If people needed to understand my political persuasions in simpler terms, I would have to define myself as a Moderate. But I cannot and will not bring my own personal political views to ACN. So that is why I post that disclaimer from time to time, as it calls for it. If certain select people puke over that, I'm sorry, maybe a good antacid will help...or cut down on the happy hours. Or maybe actually spend some time getting involved in your own community in a positive manner, rather than pointing the finger from afar and complaining. When you decide to do that, you always have a voice on ACN's Opinions & Issues department, AmadorSoapbox.com.
I guess there will always be haters...bad oily beans in the bin. Just never want them to spoil the whole bunch.
---
Amador Community News is found at NewsAmador.com.
Facebook: Facebook.com/AmadorCounty
Twitter: Twitter.com/Amador411
Amador Community News is a part of the Knight Community News Network, a global network of community news, information and resource sites. kcnn.org
I know it's been a while since posting, but I've been busy with my little Amador County community e-newspaper/blog, Amador Community News. It's been an interesting week; many more are catching on to the concept of independent, community news. It looks like I'm finally reaching that broad demographic plane consisting of those "from one to ninety-two" via Facebook, Twitter and Google+. The best thing, however, has always been that ol' over the fence, word-of-mouth. Every once in a while, I'll post: "Say you saw it...on ACN"...people actually do, and I appreciate it. All of our readers appreciate it. I find great satisfaction, knowing that I can help with the flow of information in Amador County.
Last week I posted an announcement about a Town Hall meeting being held in Plymouth, where Congressman Tim McClintock would be present to take a few questions from the citizens in attendance. Every time I run something that might be politically charged, I run the following disclaimer: "Amador Community News, NewsAmador.com is a non-partisan and politically neutral community news, information and resource site, and does not endorse political parties or candidates."
After posting the announcement for the meeting on ACN's Facebook wall, a certain reader commented that ACN's stance of being non-partisan and politically neutral made her want to "puke".
Why would such a thing piss someone off like that? I really don't know. In a nation already cluttered with slanted, biased, politically-charged (and bought) media, I don't find it difficult at all to be non-partisan. I believe that community news is about the community's voice, not advertisers' voices, and there's room for everyone to express their views (with respect).
After the "puke" comment, there were several more comments with the nature of "tell McClintock" this or that. I gathered from the comments that many do not like McClintock's politics. After a while, however, I felt like I was being shot at (for simply being the messenger), so I pulled the post, but not before defending ACN. But I still had to wonder why so many felt more comfortable posting on ACN's Facebook wall, than taking the time to get out from behind their computers or cell phones, actually attending the Town Hall Meeting in person and facing the Congressman themselves. After all...I see their Facebook posts. They have plenty of time to drink and schmooze and social gatherings and events, but don't have the time to attend a town hall meeting for 10-15 minutes?
Oh well, I guess I'm just naive. I suppose people just aren't used to or ready for a non-partisan, politically neutral platform that is open and willing to receive Letters to the Editor, commentaries and opinions, regardless of political affiliation.
Funny...I thought that's what the First Amendment was all about:
"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment
of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom
of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble,
and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances." (First
Amendment of the U.S.
Consititution)
This Amendment does not define who has these freedoms; it says that Congress "shall make no law". But it also doesn't give permission to influential political parties, affluent organizations (including religious), and corporate media to make some sort of "unspoken" set of laws or rules that assume to define those freedoms for the rest of us. It also doesn't define social, nor economic class...
It does include the words "freedom"..."free exercise"..."right of the people"..."peaceably to assemble"..."petition the Government". These are all things and actions that Congress cannot make laws against. So where does the power lie? In the hands of the people.
I cannot prevent disgruntled readers, armchair politicians and religious zealots from posting what they do on Facebook. The most I can do is delete, block and mediate the kind of content I do or do not allow for ACN. But what I will do is defend what community media stands for, and I stand for First Amendment rights that many people have seem to forgotten about because of the global soup of corporate media muck that readers have to sink or swim through to get the facts. So I will leave it up to the corporate, ad-driven media giants and their loyal subjects to do their so-called "fair and unbiased" reporting, be the bearers of "shock value" entertainment news, and influence the ignorant with their contrived hokey-pokey dances. I'd rather focus more on content than advertising. I'd rather focus upon what Amador County's communities are doing to build each other up and improve. I'd rather give Amador County the spotlight, give them a platform to have a true voice as to what they are "all about"...and to me, we the people is "what it's all about".
I was born into and raised in a Republican, right-winged household. A life-changing event in 1996 had affected me in all aspects of life - socially, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, politically. But today, for the record, I truly am non-partisan. I'm not a Republican nor Democrat, nor any party whatsoever. I'm not on the left, nor right. If people needed to understand my political persuasions in simpler terms, I would have to define myself as a Moderate. But I cannot and will not bring my own personal political views to ACN. So that is why I post that disclaimer from time to time, as it calls for it. If certain select people puke over that, I'm sorry, maybe a good antacid will help...or cut down on the happy hours. Or maybe actually spend some time getting involved in your own community in a positive manner, rather than pointing the finger from afar and complaining. When you decide to do that, you always have a voice on ACN's Opinions & Issues department, AmadorSoapbox.com.
I guess there will always be haters...bad oily beans in the bin. Just never want them to spoil the whole bunch.
---
Amador Community News is found at NewsAmador.com.
Facebook: Facebook.com/AmadorCounty
Twitter: Twitter.com/Amador411
Amador Community News is a part of the Knight Community News Network, a global network of community news, information and resource sites. kcnn.org
Thursday, January 16, 2014
I think I remember how to be nice. Whew. There, I said it...
Found this article on the Dutch Bros. Coffee Facebook page:
Man, I wish I could've been a part of that study!
I really don't need a scientific explanation, justification, or excuse to validate my caffeine consumption. All I have to do is wait for x-amount-of-time to pass before an article comes out on a study of why coffee is bad for you. Usually, it's not that coffee/caffeine is necessarily bad or good for you. It comes down to moderation versus excessive.
What is "excessive"? I don't know. I have mornings where I just drink a few cups of coffee, and there are some days where I find myself making pot after pot. It just depends on the day. If I'm grumpy and stressed, watch out. If I'm positive and productive, you can sigh with relief. However, I've had days where I'm productive with just a few cups or a lot of cups...and can also be utterly unproductive with just a few cups or a lot of cups. Sooo...I think it has a lot to do with me and my attitude du jour, not the coffee. But it would be nice to prevent Alzheimer's or dementia (side benefits?), so maybe I'll gulp down a ginkgo biloba capsule with my morning joe. Couldn't hurt, right? Or maybe it could. I don't know...let's do a study!
I recently signed the Charter for Compassion. The church I direct music for, Trinity Epsicopal, is partnering with this global "Golden Rule"-type movement, and my Amador County news blog, NewsAmador.com's Faith & Values department, AmadorInterfaith.com, is joining Trinity in a local campaign launch of the Charter in Amador County on January 25th, CompassionateAmador.com.
The moment I read and subsequently signed the Charter, I felt it reflected everything that I ever felt about religion and spirituality since leaving Mormonism. I have to hand it to Karen Armstrong for the stance, strength and inspiration in putting together this amazing, global community project. My excitement and support has not subsided since signing it, but at the same time, it has often caused me to reflect upon who I am in this global community of over 104K (and counting). Is this just another peace movement that will rise and fall? Is it another "Occupy" this or that? Is it just another "for 50 cents a day..." corporate organization with motivational speakers who want to market love, make advertisers rich, sell books?
How is this any different?
For me, all it took was one phrase in the Charter that had me spellbound. The blood even drained from my face and chills went up my spine in reaction to what my eyes had just read, and my mind comprehended and internalized (basically, I think I went into some mild form of shock):
"Coffee may boost brain's ability to store long-term
memories, study claims"
http://www.theguardian.com/science/2014/jan/12/coffee-boost-brain-long-term-memoriesMan, I wish I could've been a part of that study!
I really don't need a scientific explanation, justification, or excuse to validate my caffeine consumption. All I have to do is wait for x-amount-of-time to pass before an article comes out on a study of why coffee is bad for you. Usually, it's not that coffee/caffeine is necessarily bad or good for you. It comes down to moderation versus excessive.
What is "excessive"? I don't know. I have mornings where I just drink a few cups of coffee, and there are some days where I find myself making pot after pot. It just depends on the day. If I'm grumpy and stressed, watch out. If I'm positive and productive, you can sigh with relief. However, I've had days where I'm productive with just a few cups or a lot of cups...and can also be utterly unproductive with just a few cups or a lot of cups. Sooo...I think it has a lot to do with me and my attitude du jour, not the coffee. But it would be nice to prevent Alzheimer's or dementia (side benefits?), so maybe I'll gulp down a ginkgo biloba capsule with my morning joe. Couldn't hurt, right? Or maybe it could. I don't know...let's do a study!
I recently signed the Charter for Compassion. The church I direct music for, Trinity Epsicopal, is partnering with this global "Golden Rule"-type movement, and my Amador County news blog, NewsAmador.com's Faith & Values department, AmadorInterfaith.com, is joining Trinity in a local campaign launch of the Charter in Amador County on January 25th, CompassionateAmador.com.
The moment I read and subsequently signed the Charter, I felt it reflected everything that I ever felt about religion and spirituality since leaving Mormonism. I have to hand it to Karen Armstrong for the stance, strength and inspiration in putting together this amazing, global community project. My excitement and support has not subsided since signing it, but at the same time, it has often caused me to reflect upon who I am in this global community of over 104K (and counting). Is this just another peace movement that will rise and fall? Is it another "Occupy" this or that? Is it just another "for 50 cents a day..." corporate organization with motivational speakers who want to market love, make advertisers rich, sell books?
How is this any different?
For me, all it took was one phrase in the Charter that had me spellbound. The blood even drained from my face and chills went up my spine in reaction to what my eyes had just read, and my mind comprehended and internalized (basically, I think I went into some mild form of shock):
"We therefore call upon all men and women ~ to restore
compassion to the center of morality and religion ~ to return to the ancient
principle that any interpretation of scripture that breeds violence, hatred or
disdain is illegitimate..."
Wow! Yep, they said it. illegitimate. Just one word that so many religions and belief systems needed to hear, after centuries upon centuries of inhumanity, pride, hypocrisy and violence. Have I been guilty of any of those things in my lifetime? Besides inhumanity and violence, I have to admit, yes, I have. In the name of religion or scripture? Yes, I have...and I'm embarrassed!
What does signing the Charter for Compassion mean to me, personally? Here are random thoughts I've had:
I've looked back at some of my Facebook posts, and there were a few times where I admit that I have not been nice. Doesn't even matter if it was or might have been true or completely right; I wasn't nice. I could use excuses that I was having a bad day, or that bad things were happening in my life at the time, or someone was being mean to me and I was just being defensive. But those are not excuses for saying or writing disparaging words, or thinking I was some pompous know-it-all asshole because I shared or forwarded something that I identified with, where someone else did the legwork to actually find out the facts. I do not and will not find excuses for my own poor behavior, period.
I've looked back upon my own spiritual journey, and remember the conditions of being a "member" of a church, a denomination, a board member, etc. These conditions sometimes defined what I could eat, drink, wear, write my articles for...but more importantly: who I hung out with. They required me to pretend for the sake of appearances, so as to not reflect badly upon a church or an organization. Most of those organizations were Christian (okay, all of those organizations were Christian). In my lifetime, I've hung out and have befriended those that a vast majority would bill as "sinners". So, okay...I'm a sinner. But if those "Christians" would actually read their precious Bibles and see their hypocrisy, maybe I wouldn't be writing this. Those who cast the first stone...(John 8:7)
I've looked back and have remembered moments where I've just plain had a bad attitude. Like we all haven't had a bad attitude at some time in our lives? Does that make me a bad person? No. It makes me human. However, I'm still not quite sure I'm a "saved" human. Oh, gracious me. I was born/raised/baptized in the Mormon religion, also baptized as a born-again Christian, was a member of the Southern Baptist Convention, am currently the Music Director of an Episcopal church, am very close with many Pagan communities...so I really don't know by whose standards I am legitimate these days. Does it matter? Apparently, it does, but...the thing that rings true is: Be nice.
I want to be nice. I want to be compassionate. But...it's difficult! I have a hard time with people who are drunk ass-kissers. I have problems with those who are on ego trips. I have problems with those who lie, cheat, steal, murder, plunder and think they're awesome because of it. I have problems with those who "friend" me on Facebook, not because they're necessarily my "friend" but because they want to be associated with me because they want something from me. I have a problem with those who say they're something they're not.
I have a problem with religion, not because it's a bad thing, but because it's a very touchy subject for me to deal with, based upon my own life. I don't know about you, but I am coming around to my own; I'm beginning to see that, because of the Charter for Compassion, that what I've been saying about "love" for many years might actually be sticking to the wall.
Compassion is going to be a great struggle for me, but I signed a Charter that has beautifully stated what I have always believed. So if you are one of those people in my life that I have to really, really struggle to find compassion for, all I can say is, consider yourself fortunate.
I'm going to try to find the "better person" in me this year. Cup in hand, no doubt...
Carol
I want to be nice. I want to be compassionate. But...it's difficult! I have a hard time with people who are drunk ass-kissers. I have problems with those who are on ego trips. I have problems with those who lie, cheat, steal, murder, plunder and think they're awesome because of it. I have problems with those who "friend" me on Facebook, not because they're necessarily my "friend" but because they want to be associated with me because they want something from me. I have a problem with those who say they're something they're not.
I have a problem with religion, not because it's a bad thing, but because it's a very touchy subject for me to deal with, based upon my own life. I don't know about you, but I am coming around to my own; I'm beginning to see that, because of the Charter for Compassion, that what I've been saying about "love" for many years might actually be sticking to the wall.
Compassion is going to be a great struggle for me, but I signed a Charter that has beautifully stated what I have always believed. So if you are one of those people in my life that I have to really, really struggle to find compassion for, all I can say is, consider yourself fortunate.
I'm going to try to find the "better person" in me this year. Cup in hand, no doubt...
Carol
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
By Ear
I'm in the market for a new coffee maker. Not something fancy; I don't like a lot of bells and whistles when it comes to my morning ritual. What I really love is a French press, but I haven't been able to find a real good sturdy one that could take the kind of beating I give 'em. I did really love my Vietnamese coffee pot for a while, but the aluminum filter got bent, and well...it was never the same after that.
I'm guessing that whatever I get, it's gonna have to be solid [stainless] steel...I already have that, but it's only four cups. Time to boost the economy, venture out of my grind-infested hole, and actually deal with society. Wish me luck...
Tonight I will be at Trinity Episcopal Church, doing my "day job" as their Music Director. I have to say, I'm one of the lucky ones who have a small group of talented, dedicated singers who rely on me to have music prepared in packets, arranged for parts, mindful of their own personal schedules and commitment levels. I very much appreciate each one of them and what they bring to the table, musically. I'm not an Episcopalian (and never will be), however...being able to serve at a church where the doors are open for anyone and everyone, "whoever you are, wherever you are on your spiritual journey, you are welcome here"...I can rightfully and honestly say that Trinity is my church "home".
No, I don't recite the "Creed"...I stand up/sit down when I want to...I will recite the Lord's Prayer, only because I, my own self, find a bit of comfort in it. But other than that, I'm kind of a loner when it comes to spiritual things these days. I think it has a lot to do with my Mormon upbringing...I am no longer big on traditions tied to doctrine (and vice-versa). But there's something about Trinity that picks on a single heart string:
Not all traditions are "bad".
Truth really is, the majority of us (Christians alike) are all pagans. But if I had a "religion" to pick, I'd have to say that music would be it. Before any religion or cult wanted to claim me as their own, I know for a fact that all of them would have to back down...because music was, will and would always be my first love...and it will be my last.
Very few know my musical story. My [adopted] mother, Thelma, heard and witnessed me picking out melodies on a toy xylophone while I was still in the crib. I remember that xylophone, too...had black and white keys! Didn't matter, though, because I picked out tunes completely by ear. Whatever I heard, I played or sang. Simple songs, like "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star"..."Three Blind Mice"...and whatever was playing on Sesame Street, or on the TV. Yep. I heard it.
I was about three years old when my sister, Kim, was taking piano lessons (she's 10 years older than me). When she would finish practicing her lessons, I would climb up on the piano stool and play, by ear, what she had just practiced. My mom was completely cued in on this, and tried to convince Mrs. Francis Kelliher - my sister's piano teacher - to take me on as a student. However, Kelliher would not take me on because I was way too young (three years old would basically be babysitting, haha!), however...she said that she would give me private lessons when I turned four.
Sure enough, near/around my fourth birthday, my mother took me to Kelliher's house and she let me loose on the three upright pianos in her basement. I went from piano to piano, playing what I knew, by ear. From that moment until I turned eight years old and debuted at the University of Wyoming with Beethoven's Piano Sonata, No. 25 in G Major...the first movement I had learned completely by ear...I knew that music would forever be my life friend.
I auditioned for my first piano competition when I was in eighth grade, going on ninth. I had to submit a taped recording of some Chopin piece (I don't even remember what it was). All I really remember now is a whirlwind of auditions, competitions, music festivals, etc. where I won this and that, received many honors, medals and scholarships. But music, for me, has never been about honors, medals and scholarships. It has never been about an ego complex, never has been about proving my own self on some self-righteous path of being a "know-it-all" on anything. Quite the opposite! It would be disrespectful.
Music was there when I felt as light as a feather, or heavy as a brick. Music was there when my parents grounded me, when my friends abandoned me, when a boyfriend broke up with me, when my world dissolved around me. Music has been there for me, no matter what. Put 88 keys before my eyes, and I will play what is in my heart. The revelation might be happy, mournful, angry, or pensive, but...what will come out will be me.
Okay, that said....I really kinda like all this dub step stuff. It's pretty bad ass, only because it speaks to some of my lower frequencies (don't think about that too much, but I like Deadmaus and Skrillex). I also love bluegrass, folk and Celtic music...roots music, stuff I grew up on.
Music...no matter where it comes from, will always have my frequencies cued in...and I hope, in yours as well!
Music...no matter where it comes from, will always have my frequencies cued in...and I hope, in yours as well!
Carol
Saturday, January 4, 2014
For the love of Peets...and the "root of all evil"?
Still chugging away at this Peet's French Roast this morning. I think I'm in the market for a new coffee maker...since my French press broke a couple months ago, I've had to use a 4-cup brewer. While I [somewhat] like the control of consumption of just a few cups at a time, I've been at the mercy of "auto-drip"...which can cause a caffeine addict such as myself to look at the clock and tap my foot.
Yesterday I bought some "Spiced Latte" Coffee Mate; it tastes a lot like gingerbread-flavored creamer. Lots of coffee
creamers are on sale at a reduced price, now that the holidays are over. I ran out of my "real vanilla" that I bought online on MexGrocer.com, so I'm having to settle with some el-cheapo vanilla syrup that I spied at the dollar store. Not bad...not good either, but not bad.
A friend of mine recently posted the following article on her Facebook page. I found it interesting:
I loved that quote: "“How many Mozarts are working in steel mills?'” Wow, how my musician cronies and I can relate to that! The story of the unskilled worker, "Stanley", is a story that is true for so many people. As a musician most of my life, I’ve never really fallen under
the “middle class” category. Like millions upon millions of Americans, I'd have to say that I'm in the class of the “working poor” as a church music director. I do love to live simply, and make no mistake, money is a systematic, necessary evil if you wish to survive in the ever-evolving economic climate(s). But when you see how those climates are being redefined, you do whatever is needed, always being aware of and slaying the proverbial "dinosaurs" along the way.
Notice I used the word "need". When a new product or service is introduced to any market or community, homework needs to be done. One needs to determine if the target demographics need the product/service. One needs to find out if there is already a saturation of products/services in a community before launching a web site or opening doors for business. One needs to calculate the risks associated with competition...the "latest and greatest" versus the "tried and true".
I run Amador Community News as a community media and promotions service for Amador County
I've always had an entrepreneurial
heart, mind and spirit, but I tend to do something that not many like to do these days: I like to share. I don't need a union to represent me, I don't need to be a part of corporate media. My present problem with ACN is growing pains...I'm getting to the point where I really cannot do this all on my own. I've had surges of feast or famine over the past seven years, but it's coming to the point where I really need department editors, reporters, writers. The pain of success is a good "problem" to have, yet there are many of us who face a "catch 22" in taking our products/services to the next level in an economic climate and government that has been set up to enslave, rather than enrich.
Make no mistake; changes need to be made. But unions aren't going to do it. Wall Street isn't going to do it. The government isn't going to do it, and I guarantee you that lawmakers and attorneys sure aren't going to do it. People will have to do it. How? By investing in other people, in their communities, in their local economy. It's easy to be distracted by national and global problems, and stories such as this one. However, I would like to see the stories of success by real people who have been helped by real people in their own communities, regardless of class. I have a few stories of my own; I know for a fact that ACN would not be doing so well today without the help of real people - rich or poor, male or female, gay or straight, conservative or liberal. The red herrings, like this article, might lead one to believe that there is only one solution.
I am only one person, and I know that there those who like to show off their own sandcastles by knocking others’ down, but that’s just not how I roll. I would rather invite more and more people over into my sandbox to share tools and toys. With me, there’s room for everyone. You don't even have to be my friend, you don't have to schmooze with me...hell, you don't have to like me at all. But I will help you in any way that I can. Why?
Because I can. It's my job.
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Amador County is known as "Little Napa". Why? See for yourself! Take a friend (or many!) up to the Shenandoah Valley, and enjoy California's Zinfandel capitol.
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Need an AWESOME auto body/mechanic dude? I have a friend, Danny, in Sacramento who does AWESOME auto body work and repairs, at...I kid you NOT...a FRACTION of what you would pay elsewhere! Dan the Auto Man. Give him a call, tell him that I referred you! 916-470-9767.
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Actually found this at SaveMart. I'm winding down my Netflix "Bollywood-A-Thon", but I've been craving Indian food:
My fave Indian restaurant is Kaveri, off of Fulton here in Sac. A new one opened up a bit closer, Mirage, but I haven't tried it yet. Anyone want to join me?
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You can email me at: carol@coffeepong.com
Also on Facebook at: facebook.com/coffeepong
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Left-over "Christmas Crack": Forgive me, for I have sinned. Happy New Day!
"Forgive me, Water, for I have sinned...for I have not yet turned on the coffee maker. I'll say five "Coffee Cherrys" and clean up the kitchen a bit while I wait for you to drip down through the filter funnel, giving me this day my daily grind."
This was my penance this morning after Charles took off for work. Coffee grounds can be such a pain to clean up...especially the glob that spills out of the wet, ripped coffee filter as you race to put it in the garbage can.
Speaking of sins...I discovered a few temptations yesterday which were hidden underneath some piles of fudge that Charles had been consuming in mass quantities since Christmas Day:
I've now come to the understanding that Charles' sister (the cook from whence this confectionery crack cometh) doesn't just make amazingly addicting fudge. She also makes a variety of sweets that no diabetic or chocoholic should ever know about. My favorite every Christmas is shortbread; and then there's those little Mexican wedding cookies that seem to pop up on a lot of dessert plates during the holidays. Yeah, she made those, as well as some sort of layered chocolate-caramel, crumb-crusted indulgence that might keep me locked away in my own personal confession booth for the next few days...that is, if they even last that long.
Ah, the New Year. Time to celebrate time. It's kinda of cliche to start a New Year's Eve writing with, "Looking back at 2013...", so I won't (and didn't), but I really don't want to look back. What I really want to say is "To hell with 2013..." and live today, right now, right this moment, and live every day doing what I love with people that I love.
“I never see what has been done; I only see what remains to be done.” - Buddha
And when the broken-hearted people
Living in the world agree
There will be an answer, let it be
For though they may be parted
There is still a chance that they will see
There will be an answer, let it be...
And when the night is cloudy
There is still a light that shines on me
Shine on until tomorrow, let it be
I wake up to the sound of music,
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be
This was my penance this morning after Charles took off for work. Coffee grounds can be such a pain to clean up...especially the glob that spills out of the wet, ripped coffee filter as you race to put it in the garbage can.
Speaking of sins...I discovered a few temptations yesterday which were hidden underneath some piles of fudge that Charles had been consuming in mass quantities since Christmas Day:
Ah, the New Year. Time to celebrate time. It's kinda of cliche to start a New Year's Eve writing with, "Looking back at 2013...", so I won't (and didn't), but I really don't want to look back. What I really want to say is "To hell with 2013..." and live today, right now, right this moment, and live every day doing what I love with people that I love.
“I never see what has been done; I only see what remains to be done.” - Buddha
Big heavy sigh. There's a lot that needs to be done in this world. But because I "dream big", I often have the tendency to bite off more than I can chew...which not only make the activities and events of each day more difficult to swallow, the digestive process can often leave me ...well, let's just say with "less than desirable" results.
It is sometimes difficult to let go of the past. I've struggled with the "looking back" thing for so long, I've become accustomed to dealing with certain things in my life with some sort of PTSD-induced "fight-or-flight" mode. Sometimes thinking about the past makes me bitter and resentful; at other times, it makes me laugh. I guess in some cases it's true when someone says that "someday we're going to look back on this and laugh". Well, 2013 was a side-splitter, for sure.
One thing I do know the past has done was make me a rebellious, resistant prisoner...with occasional moments where I was set free to crawl through small windows of time to get a glimpse of a world beyond bars that I know many prison guards would like me to remain behind. I guess the question I've asked myself several times is whether I've "learned my lesson(s)" or will I continue trying to escape. The more I ask myself this question, the more I realize that the truth is, I've already done my time...and the prison bars that would continue to lock me in the past are anything but real.
I've spent the past few months trying to think of a simple mantra for my morning meditation time, and I think I finally found it (no surprise that it is part of a song): "Let it be." It's said that "Mother Mary" is a reference to Paul McCartney's dream about his own mother. Of course, I sometimes wonder if my own mom would appear to me in a dream with the words "Told you so!". But that wouldn't be a very good mantra.
When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be
And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right in front of me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be...
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be
And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right in front of me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be...
And when the broken-hearted people
Living in the world agree
There will be an answer, let it be
For though they may be parted
There is still a chance that they will see
There will be an answer, let it be...
And when the night is cloudy
There is still a light that shines on me
Shine on until tomorrow, let it be
I wake up to the sound of music,
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be
Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be...
Let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be...
("Let It Be" - From the album, Let It Be, Written by Paul McCartney, John Lennon, Paul James and John Winston. Copyright © by Sony/ATV Tunes LLC)
Happy New Day, everyone!
Carol
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Everybody Loves Logan
Now I know why they're called "Golden Retrievers". There are angels...and then there are "Golden" Angels. I was lucky today to see my four-footed angel's halo today!
Monday, December 30, 2013
Christmas blend...tinkling bells...new year gongs...
Oh man, Monday morning coffee tastes SOooo good!
Still working on that Peet's French Roast this week. I'm
also working on a generic, "less popular" coffee that I got at
Grocery Outlet (that Christmas Blend where I shouldn't have used eggnog as a
creamer). It’s pretty good; a little milk and a “spoonful of sugar” make my addictive morning stimulant go down.
Like I said in my last blog post, I'm not a coffee snob.
I'll pretty much drink any java that's put in front of me, but once tasted, I
cannot be held responsible for any reaction or look on my face - or words that might
roll off my tongue - should it taste like crap. It does depends on the day
or moment...most of the time I'll just suck it up and suck it down, but never actually ask me for an honest opinion about your coffee
unless you really want to hear it! ;)
I do prefer grinding my own beans versus pre-ground coffee,
but I usually stick to a tried-and-true for my every day fix. Lately, my every day
coffee is (gasp!) a pre-ground espresso, CaféBustello…a yellow vacuum -packed can of hearty, eye-opening goodness. I
also like the reasonably-priced Trader Joe’s “Joe” (is there an echo, echo, echo?). Honestly, I will pretty much buy anything my meager budget will allow and keep my
mornings, well…grounded.
Starbucks, Peets, Seattle 's
Best, etc. all good coffee. Most of the time I prefer a little mom-and-pop
coffeehouses to the commercial ones. For me, it’s not necessarily about experiencing the coffee itself,
but where you experience as well…whether home or abroad. Hey, there are times you want
a Big Mac…or what you really want is a Moo Burger at Mel and Faye's!
Which kinda brings me to today's topic: Name brands versus generics.
Popular commercial versus little-known/local-humble. If I see coffee on sale,
sure, I might give it a try. I received a few Starbucks gift cards for
Christmas, and you can be sure those will always be put to good use. It’s all
good; this is America ,
there’s room for everyone! I am not ashamed to say that I shop at thrift shops and
dollar stores. I also love one-of-a-kind handmade stuff. Knowing that
someone spent the time creating, crafting and putting a part of themselves into
their creation makes me smile and feel real happy inside. That goes for coffee
roasters, big and small, local and global. But most of the time, I’d rather
choose to spend $5 on a generic can of coffee at Trader Joe’s versus $5 on a quad-shot
Venti Carmel Macchiato at Starbucks.
On a somewhat related subject…not so long ago I received an
email from a fan who stumbled across my Unorthodox Christianity
blog, and read a few of my writings and posts. I have severely neglected that
blog...in fact, I hadn't touched it in over a year. But don’t worry (or maybe you should)...I’ll resurrect it one of these days. It will most likely
become my Sunday afternoon activity. That is, after I’ve had my Sunday nap. Don’t mess
with my day of rest!
Anyhoo, here’s the exchange (below). Make yourself another
cup, and enjoy!
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Carol,
"I would like you to know that I have never read any blog or print for that matter that adheres to my same beliefs of Christianity. I am not much of a "blogger" type person, but yours caught my eye for some reason and I read it. The more I read, the more I realized how much truth you have and was able to back your beliefs with scripture. I very much think that our modern Christian church will ultimately be the death of true Christianity...
"I would like you to know that I have never read any blog or print for that matter that adheres to my same beliefs of Christianity. I am not much of a "blogger" type person, but yours caught my eye for some reason and I read it. The more I read, the more I realized how much truth you have and was able to back your beliefs with scripture. I very much think that our modern Christian church will ultimately be the death of true Christianity...
"...As I see the world turning, humans need to resort
back to the actual teaching of the Bible in layman's terms, rather than trying
to categorize what "denomination" they are. I think that today's
Christian music is turning more and more this way as well, as far as the
contemporary side of the genre. It is all about giving someone a way of living
that cannot be fathomed in a "black and white" perspective. The
negative to all Christian marketing is, as you stated in your blog, all about the end dollar. At the
end of the day, most not all, authors, musician, religious retail
entrepreneurs, and even - sad to say but - churches and ministers are all about
how we can make more money to grow in popularity to ultimately make more money
for themselves. I often wonder if religious leaders had no wealth opportunities
from their careers, how many of them would still do the same as they are today,
just to simply spread the word of Jesus Christ...as it was originally meant in
the Bible. I am not saying that is not what all those people are doing today,
but would they still be interested in doing it with no compensation? I know
there are some people out there for this sole purpose, but I would like to know
how many are honestly not in it for just that reason. I look forward to your
response to this email and would also like you to criticize my beliefs to help
me learn more of your beliefs and values."
Sincerely,
Tyler
Sincerely,
And...my response:
Hey, Tyler.
I can't really criticize anyone's beliefs. I believe that I
can, however, criticize systematic beliefs/organized religion. I believe that
all should have the freedom to follow their own path, their own journey, and do
what is right for them, AS LONG AS 1) it is not hypocritical, and 2) does not
harm others, or compel them to harm others "in the name of God".
What I also adamantly dislike are missions or
"ministries" that entice people to join as members out of guilt,
fear, or a false sense of social or political belonging and empowerment (cults,
or cliquish, club-like denominations). Religious membership, in my opinion,
causes division, prejudice and dangerous amounts of pride. When one
believes that they are better than another, or have the "only truth",
or believe that others are damned to hell if they don't go through some belief ritual
or process, it is...well, not only a hurtful thing to do, but it also causes
war and dissension.
You mentioned money and the "end dollar". I
believe that money can be used for good and evil purposes. Many times, the
issue is about the hands that money falls into. I love the story of the widow's
mite (Luke 21:1-4), or Jesus' cleansing of the temple (Matt. 21:12-17), the
coin from the fish's mouth to pay taxes (Matt: 17: 27) or the "render to
Caesar" response (Mark 12:17). Money is a system...and it is and has
always been worshiped as a god...but it's not a god that is easily competed
with. Jesus is right; you cannot serve God and money, and who knows, there are
some who might eventually learn the wrath of one god...or the other.
In the mean time, back at the ranch...have we even learned
the basics? Love God, love our neighbors as ourselves, love our enemies. We
haven't even learned how to love each other OR our own selves! That isn't the
fault of religion; it's the fault of people who have been taught to
love conditionally. It's the fault of people who did not teach their
children how to love unconditionally. It's the fault of people who
interpret scriptures that might lift their own selves or ministries up.
To me, organized religion/belief has become this very large
prison system of souls filled with "Stockholm
Syndrome"...and as a result, mainstream, contemporary
Christianity, and its vast numbers of denominations and ministries have simply
become a mass of "tinkling bells and resounding gongs" (1 Cor.
13:1)...dot com! ;)
Carol
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